GroshLink

As you may remember, I began sharing material from Sacred Companions: The Gift of Spiritual Friendship & Direction (David G. Benner. IVP. 2002), which I'm reading for SF723: Christian Spiritual Direction, with Sacred Companions off the shelf and in the reader's hand (8/25/2011) and followed up with material from Chapter 1 (8/28/2011).* In Chapter 2: Hospitality, Presence & Dialogue, I begin to wrestle with the call of spiritual direction.

Hospitality, Presence & Dialogue begins with an illustration of the author, as a parent, learning from his "son about being a companion on a journey . . . a successful tour leader" (46, 46).

All it takes is liking people enough that you don't mind being with them eighteen hours a day, listening to them enough to know what they want and like even better than they do, and being ready to be their mother and take care of whatever goes wrong! (46)

How true it is that "[b]eing must precede doing. . . . spiritual friendship is a gift of hospitality, presence and dialogue. While all of these have a component of doing -- that is, they have to be lived out -- they are grounded in ways of being" (46).

Although, I've long enjoyed images of journey such as the one of the cover of Sacred Companions, as I raised in Sacred Companions: The Transformational Journey, Chapter 1, I shy away from journey language. Some additional musings: maybe it's influenced by my longing for action and adventure OR my late 1980's-early 1990's forays into the New Age Movement, which turned up dry and hollow.

By contrast, hospitality in the home, the Garden of Eden, and the new heavens and new earth resonate with me deeply. And what does it take to be hospitable to another, "inner stillness . . . Solitude of heart comes from attentiveness ot the presence of God" (46-47). Yes, this comes from Henri Nouwen, whose writing I've found a great blessing over 15 years of following Christ in ministry.

I have come to embrace the safe presence in the One who ministers through those who are a gracious gift to genuinely and attentively guiding one's head, heart, and hands through co-discernment. I rejoice in God's provision of spiritual directors and spiritual friendships through thick and thin. Personally, I see my work through the lens of spiritual friendship. At times I have blessed others with something close to spiritual direction. Is this possibly a next step in ministry? If so, what would it look like, particularly if it were to come alongside the activities, fellowships, and events of which I am a part?

I think a significant question for me to address is how well a listener I truly can be. I enjoy conversation/dialogue. But as a verbal processor and problem solver (individuals, fellowships, campuses, ministries), many times I have too much to say.

When we treat others as objects, even for benevolent reasons, we rob them of their humanity. The cardiologist who views her patient as "the man with arteriosclerosis" or the attorney who treats his client as "the woman with a messy divorce" have reduced the people they seek to help to a set of symptons. . . .

But benevolence without respect is dehumanizing, because it reduces the other person to an object. . . .

Respect is the foundation of dialogue, and Christians have a unique resource for offering it: eyes of faith that allow us to see those we encounter as deeply loved by God and bearing his image.

The most important thing I can do is help the other person be in contact with the gracious presence of Christ. I bring anything of value to the meeting, it is that I mediate divine grace. This is the core of Christian soul care. At their best, Christian friends help each other discern God's presence, recognize it as a presence of grace, come to trust that grace and surrender to it more fully.

God's will is that we surrender to his love. Spiritual friends facilitate this surrender and in so doing facilitate Christian spiritual growth and transformation (55-57). . . .

"Spiritual dialogue is therefore prayer, a conversation in which the Holy Spirit is present as Christian friends mediate God's grace to each other" (59). May it be so in our home, family, neighborhood, local assembly, campuses, special events, and larger connections.

*Note: if you're interested in discussing the material with me (possibly even reading Sacred Companions alongside me), please drop me a message.